A New Book for White Women

Hey! There’s a new book out for white women! It’s called Let’s Cozy Up to the Patriarchy! You don’t need any help with that, but why not give it a whirl? Likeable selections include:

  • A list of occasions to drink some wine. Because it’s easier to get a little buzz on than to face uncomfortable truths, amirite?
  • A free coupon for YOUR photo with the President-Elect! His hand will be on your ass at no extra charge, and you’re okay with that. It’s how guys are!
  • Some sample letters to send to the President-elect, so you can send your photo and ask him to rate your appearance from a one to a ten. His reply will include some beauty tips from famous supermodels! Because how can you feel good about yourself if the future leader of the free world thinks you’re only a four?
  • A list of unconvincing things to say to prove you aren’t racist.
  • A list of unconvincing things to say to prove you aren’t sexist. This page is perforated so you can just tear it out and throw it away. Because who cares what those angry feminists think? They’re always getting their panties in a wad about every little thing!

Get your copy today! Free signings on Inauguration Day!

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